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文本歌词
Albert And The 'Eadsman - Stanley Holloway
On young Albert Ramsbottom's birthday
His parents asked what he'd like most
He said to see t Tower of London
And gaze upon Anne Boleyn's ghost
They thowt this request were unusual
And at first to refuse were inclined
Til Pa said a trip t metrollopse
Might broaden the little lad's mind
They took charrybank up to London
And got there at quarter to fower
Then seeing as pubs wasn't open
They went straight away to the tower
They didn't think much to the buildin
T weren't what they'd been led to suppose
And the Bad Word' Tower didn't impress them
They said Blackpool had got one of those
At last Albert found a Beefeater
And filled the old chap with alarm
By asking for Ghost of Anne Boleyn
As carried her ead neath her arm
Said Beefeater You ought to come Fridays
If it's ghost of Anne Boleyn you seek
Her union now limits her output
And she only gets one walk a week
But he said if it's ghosts that you're after
There's Lady Jane Grey's to be seen
She runs around chased by the Eadsman
At midnight on the old Tower Green
They waited on t green till near midnight
Then thinking they'd time for a sup
They took out what food they'd brought with them
And waited for t ghost to turn up
On the first stroke of twelve up jumped Albert
His mouth full of cold dripping toast
With his stick with the orses ead andle
He pointed and said Here's the ghost
They felt their skins going all goosey
As Lady Jane's Spectre drew near
And Albert fair swallered his tonsils
When the Eadsman an all did appear
The Eadsman chased Jane round the grass patch
They saw his axe flash in the moon
And seeing as poor lass were eadless
They wondered what what next he would prune
He suddenly caught sight of Albert
As midnight was on its last chime
As he lifted his axe father murmered
We'll get the insurance this time
At that Mother rose taking umbridge
She said Put that cleaver away
You're not cutting our Albert's ead off
Yon collar were clean on today
The brave little lad stood undaunted
Til the ghost were within half a pace
Then taking the toast he were eating
Slapped it dripping side down in his face
T were a proper set back for the Eadsman
He let out one owl of despair
Then taking his ladyfriend with him
He disappeared just like that there
When Pa saw the way as they vanished
He trembled with fear and looked blue
Til Ma went and patted his shoulder
An said Sallright lad we saw it too
Some say twere the drippin as done it
From a roast leg of mutton it came
And as the Eadsman had been a Beefeater
They reckon he vanished from shame
And around Tower Green from that moment
They've nere seen a sign of the ghost
But when t Beefeaters go on night duty
They take slices of cold drippin toast