文本歌词

The Biggest Aspidistra In The World - Gracie Fields
For years we had an aspidistra in a flower pot
On the what not near the atstand in the all
It didn't seem to grow 'til one day our brother Joe
Had a notion that he'd make it strong and tall
So he's crossed it with an acorn from an oak tree
And he's planted it against the garden wall
It shot up like a rocket 'til it's nearly reached the sky
It's the biggest aspidistra in the world
We couldn't see the top of it it got so bloomin' high
It's the biggest aspidistra in the world
When father's had a snoot full at his pub
The bunch of grapes
He doesn't go all fighting mad and getting into scrapes
No you'll find him in his bear skin playing tarzan of the apes
Of the biggest aspidistra in the world
The tom cats and their love to spend their evenings out
Up the biggest aspidistra in the world
They all begin meowing when the buds begin to sprout
From the biggest aspidistra in the world
The dogs all come around for miles a lovely sight to see
They sniff around for hours and hours and wag their tails with glee
So
I've had to put a notice up to say it's not a tree
It's the biggest aspidistra in the world
Me brother's in the army
He's in the home defence
With the biggest aspidistra in the world
The colonel says at topping
Now we'll start the big advance
With the biggest aspidistra in the world
When goering sees it from afar 'e'll say to his old frau
Young Joe as got his blood up war will soon be over now
For they're going to string old 'itler from the very highest bough
Of the biggest aspidistra in the world